Lingering Near the Path- Introspection by a Commitment-Challenged Creative
Hello, my name is Renee and I am an online-class junkie. I have spent thousands of dollars on classes and subscriptions and BOOKS. Wait- I don’t think this is the debilitating condition that plagues me. Under closer scrutiny, it is not an addiction to purchasing self-learning tools, but rather a refusal to commit to the process that has dampened the joy in my art life. I purchase all these classes and books to learn but then I fail to commit to the learning process.
Periodically I interrogate my inferior self- “Why don’t you follow through? Do you think you know more than the instructor? Are you too good for those exercises? Or is it just that you know you are going to fail? You are afraid that you will follow along to the letter and your bird, or portrait, or tonal strip is going to be shit!” My inferior self winces, squeezes her ears shut against the harsh line of questioning and begins whimpering… “No. I don’’t think I am too good. I just ran out of time. I am too tired at the end of the day. I can’t stay focused- there are too many other things clamoring for my attention.”
Weak excuses that all harbor a bit of truth. But that doesn’t mean I should hand all my power over to them. So- this year I intend to take my power back!
In my last blog entry, I mentioned that in place of “resolutions” I have made intentions. A resolution seems to imply a 180 degree change in behavior. In my mind, the word intention implies that there is more room to make the turn and more than one way to succeed. Because I am so easily lured off the path I have set one of my 2022 intentions to become more disciplined in my approach to learning.
Being aware that I have strayed is the first step. It sounds obvious and easy, but how often have you set out to respond to a text or email only to discover an hour later that you have been watching cute kitten videos on Tiktok for the last 45 minutes? Now cute kitten videos are rarely my nemesis, but you get the picture.
In January I set out to complete a very simple watercolor class on Skillshare. I have managed to follow along- but only by self correcting over and over again. It has taken me WEEKS to get through the class. As I immersed myself in the painting process one evening, I became self-aware. I noticed when the impatience began to set in. And then I talked myself down. I reminded myself that I enjoy getting lost in the process when I permit myself to do so. Until I become a competitive sprinter- time is not important. Who cares how long it takes me to finish the project, or a simple flower?!
How often do I fail to follow through because I do not give myself permission to surrender to time? I think this should be my mantra for February- Surrender to time. Surrender to process.
In the Studio
I embarked on this Folk Art journey for three reasons: 1. to practice following through 2. I wanted to use folk art flowers in my current project 3. simplifying forms is difficult for me.
In addition to playing with folk art, I created “Siracha” (a working title) from inked line work to digital painting. I will post the finished piece next week. I am super excited by it!
In the Shop
You can find Valentine’s in my Hummingbird Fine Craft shop. Coming this month… new travel cups. I have restocked the scissortail travel cup and will be introducing two new ones to the shop- “You Make My Heart Sing” and “Scissortail Flycatcher with Rose Rocks”.
For other products or if you don’t live in Tulsa, be sure to check out the Society6 shopping tab under the Shop menu at the top.
In the Kitchen
With snow on the ground, it’s a great time to make bread and use what’s in the freezer! Today I revived summer with a batch of Roasted Tomato Soup with garden “fresh” tomatoes from the freezer.
Roast frozen whole tomatoes drizzled with olive oil in oven at 425 for 15-20 minutes. Drizzle sweet onion slices and cloves of garlic with oil and add to tomato pan. Increase temp to 450 and roast for 20-30 minutes until onions are golden brown. I then add this pan of gooey goodness to a pot with homemade beef broth (or chicken), 4 TBSP butter, and bay leaves. Simmer for 30-40 minutes. Remove bay leaves, season, add 1/2 Cup or so of chopped fresh basil and use immersion blender to create smooth soup. Add in some milk or cream to finish it. My fresh Basil came from my counter-top Pod Garden.
Add a loaf of Sour Dough Bread with Cracked Pepper, Rosemary, and Walnuts and you have the perfect snow-day supper! A few years back I took a bread baking class with Cat Cox and it has been money and time well-spent! Using her techniques and basic instructions, I have created countless creative loaves of bread- all stunning and irresistible! If you get a chance and you are in Tulsa, take a class with @CatCoxBaker!